Muzzle Dater Sunday!

That Vanessa chick is a bit of a hard ass. We hear that she was overheard telling Harris about her new club, Sanctuary, Sunday night at the bar of the Red Dragon Inn and mentioned that she had some leg-breakers to keep crowds in line and make sure people paid their tabs. That’s not to say that she needs big burly men to make sure the crowds don’t get out of hand. Our sources say that she was quite adamant with Harris that she was more than capable of doing a little bit of crowd control herself. That’s really kind of HAWT!

Harris likes to surround himself with young women, that’s for sure. The easier the better! And Spade is certainly one of the easiest in town. We’ve lost count on the number of laps she’s been spotted on. Anyway, Harris was overheard saying that if his wife ever leaves him that he will marry Spade. Wonderful. That’s exactly what the world would need. Now the question is whether or not he’s above cheating on his wife??? We’re thinking he’s not and we’re pretty sure that Spade would have no problem sleeping with a married man.

We thought that the Many Faces of Fio was really adjusting to this whole motherhood thing but she and Lil’ Bit Lirssa were really at each other’s throats! There was quite a bit of bickering between the two before Awful Ali entered. It seems like it was all over L.B. Lirssa not telling T.M.F.O. Fio where she had dinner but we’re betting that there was something deeper to it. Could it be all those looks that Awful Ali has been shooting Eleanor??? We hate to say it since the Gossip GangSTAR himself married T.M.F.O. Fio and Awful Ali but there definitely seems to be  some chemistry between Awful Ali and Eleanor.

The night was not entirely depressing! There were a couple cute couples about! Sianna was present to keep her hubby, Head of the Fam Johnny, company during his shift! And Doc Eva and her man, Mason, were also about for the first time in quite a while. By the looks that they were shooting each other we have a theory on where they’ve been spending their time! Things certainly haven’t cooled down in their bedroom, we’re guessing! Doc Eva was overheard asking Sianna about her twins. She said they were growing big and strong and are almost a year old! Can you believe that???

Down in the Annex, Ms. Wyh Not and SUUUUPER Des were busy hosting and calling the Sunday night Fight Night! What a HAWT pair of divorcees! It looks like one of them might actually be about to become off the market as well. A… well, wolf-man named Roran has been paying a lot of attention to Ms. Wyh Not and has been eager to spend time with her, it seems. He was seen Sunday night making sure that she had a drink and keeping to her side. Iiiinteresting! We’re not sure if we ever pegged Ms. Wyh Not as the muzzle dating sort but he definitely seems to be taking good care of her. C’mon, you’re dying to know all the details of this one! We know we are! We’re going to be keeping our eyes peeled to see where it goes.

Our Darling Taneth was definitely acting a bit strange! We hear that one of the many pieces of her was walking around the Annex, asking the title holders or the Governor if there was anything she could do for them. It seems she was on hand to serve them. Quite a few of them appeared more than a little uncomfortable with the idea. The Gov MAN-tastic Matt and the Crew’s Tical both told her that they could take care of themselves and urged her to have a seat while the Crew’s Ria egged her on for her own amusement. We hear that at one point O.D. Taneth asked the Governor if he would like…. a foot rub??? Ew. This is starting to get creepy. We sure hope Tormay fixes this Taneth situation SOON!

As further proof that FLAWLESS Koy isn’t so flawless these days, we hear that she totally went off on somebody in the Annex laaaate into the night and was even seen throwing a punch outside the ring! The punch did not hit its intended target and instead collided with a cup of tea that O.D. Taneth was bringing over for her. Wow. We’re glad that Taneth herself didn’t get hit! FLAWLESS Koy seems out of control! Our sources say that her husband, the Governor MAN-tastic Matt, had to literally escort her out of the room. Not good. Not good at all!

Edited: January 2nd, 2010

GangSTAR Approved Tuesday!

It was a cheerful night in the Red Dragon Inn Tuesday night! Cutie Patootie Amber was behind the bar doing her thing and Dora was scrubbing the floors until they shined like the top of the Gov MAN-tastic Matt’s bald head! What??? MAN-tastic Matt isn’t bald??? Well, he will be when he finds out what FLAWLESS Koy’s been up to the last couple of days! It’s enough to make us pull our hair out!!! Anyway, the atmosphere was bright and the crowd even seemed to be in a good mood!

Surprisingly enough it seems that David and Ryan are still together and going strong. The pair were seen making cozy company in the Inn while sipping on apple juice and chatting to C.P. Amber about her run-in with “Santa”. And for those of you that are curious, she means Dean dressed as Santa. Our sources heard no mention of David’s sister, Darcy, and we’re forced to wonder what became of her after her break-up with Playboy Shane. She clearly must have taken it pretty hard because we haven’t seen much of her since. Such a shame!

OMG! THIS is why we LOVE Lil’ Miss Anger Management Jewell! She strutted in Tuesday night despite the cold wearing a HAWT dress with a green bodice that flowed into a peacock feathered skirt. She looked To. Die. For. And, of course, she had Crazy Train Tara for where there’s one insane not-quite-human pain in the neck woman, she’s bound to have another in tow! For  some reason, C.T. Tara had an elk. We have no idea why. We don’t ask that question when it comes to C.T.  Tara. Often times the answer just creates more questions.

Anyway, according to our sources, L.M.A.M. Jewell was overheard telling her friends that she’s been travelling but she’s home now and looking forward to meeting up with all of her old friends. And meet-up she did! We hear that she seemed super happy to see her kegsister SUUUUPER Des who has just recently returned herself! Slutty Pirate Girl Teagan was all in a tizzy over her return… but when is Slutty Pirate Girl Teagan not in a tizzy over one woman or another??? L.M.A.M. Jewell proved what a Marc Franco lover she truly is (even though she’s tried to deny it for YEARS) by saying that she’s read our blog (or probably the print-out versions since she isn’t exactly tech-saavy) enough to be slightly worried about where S.P.G. Teagan’s lips have been. BE STILL OUR TEENY TINY LITTLE HEARTS!

Is there a reunion in the works between the Dread Pirate Stephen and his ex-wife L.M.A.M. Jewell??? She was overheard telling S.P.G. Teagan that she was done with pirates but when D.P. Stephen slung his arm around her and called her by his pet name for her, she didn’t seem all that done!

Umm… for some reason SUUUUPER Des and Brale Brother Reap were entangled on the floor together??? At least according to our sources! And when are our sources EVER wrong! B.B. Reap is certainly a hit with the ladies these days, no? We’ve seen him spending time with everything from the Inn’s resident bad ass to college sorority girls to Inn institutions! No idea what’s up with him but SUUUUPER Des is newly divorced and probably looking for a good time! B.B. Reap is certainly known for being a good time. We’re not going to judge you, girlfriend! Go on and handle your business!

The siblings DeAuster were about! It’s been quite a while since we’ve seen Daniel and Cieara slumming in the Red Dragon Inn but both were there as regal as ever. They only stayed long enough for a quick drink and to exchange pleasantries with Lucky Lawyer Lucien before hurrying off for dinner. As usual, though, Daniel didn’t have to be in the Inn long before he caught the attention of a young lady! Daniel is the sort of commitment avoiding heartbreaker that all young woman should try to avoid but never do!

Are Cowboy Jake and Marvelous Mira not the cutest things ever??? We’ve been just so disappointed and upset about their woes in love but maybe it was all just to bring them to this point. He is just the perfect gentleman that she needs in her life. We mark this relationship ‘GangSTAR Approved’!

Edited: December 11th, 2009

Ms. Monday!

Heh. Things haven’t changed a whole lot in the last couple years, have they? Some of the faces may have changed but Brale Brother Baker is still asking them to pour ale on the breasts. Yeeeep! B.B. Baker was overheard asking Kendall to make him some brale. Evidently Kendall had no idea what brale was and, thankfully, B.B. Baker was too distracted by drinking to go into any details. We think she might be just the type to cut him for the mere suggestion!

B.B. Baker missed his partner in crime, Brale Brother Reap, by minutes evidently! Such a shame! It’s been too long since we’ve seen them in action together. That’s not to say that B.B. Reap isn’t fully capable of causing trouble all on his very own. We hear that he was overheard telling PJ (not the original one but the college girl) that Head Pussy Panther should install ale taps on the other side of the bar, should keep the dragons out of the Inn so they don’t blow snot on patrons, and there should be more breasts. We’re sure that H.P. Panther will get right on that. By the way, is anybody shocked that B.B. Reap became fast friends with a sorority girl???? Yeah, didn’t think so.

SUUUUPER Des two nights in a row??? We’re shocked! Pleasantly, of course! She was seen strolling into the Inn Monday night and greeted Mega Mom Icer. But it was her conversation with B.B. Reap that got our sources some MAJOR news! It seems that SUUUUPER Des is now MS. SUUUUUPER Des. She is no longer married! And you know what newly divorced women are looking for, right??? Sex without strings attached! You go get ‘em, girlfriend! B.B. Reap certainly looked interested.

Bekah and Lucky Lawyer Lucien were quite entangled late into the night when she arrived. It’s good to see that Crazy Train Tara hasn’t offed her yet. It’s really just a matter of time. We’re ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE that C.T. Tara will not allow this to stand. You don’t date one of C.T. Tara’s men without her written permission. They didn’t last long in the Inn. Not soon after Bekah got there, L.L. Lucien was whisking her off…. and we can only imagine where he was taking her. There’s something entirely yummy about that pair!

Quite the crowd gathered in the Outback for regular dueling as well as for a match between Tass, the holder of Pathfinder, and the creature known as Jiggly! Tass took the first duel but Jiggly took two nail biters after that to secure the title. Old Man Tass put up quite the fight against the odd little creature, though!

Congratulations has to go out to Jiggly even though we’re pretty sure it’s not the reading sort!

Lil’ Bit Lirssa was overheard telling Real Estate Mogul Rena that she’s doing much better in her lessons these days… which we’re glad to hear! The pair did some catching up while watching the duels. And they were even joined by Doc Eva and Manly Mason! We hear there’s been some tension between R.E.M. Rena and Doc Eva since we’ve been away. No idea why. But things seemed fine and dandy Monday night as they hung out and watched the duels go down together!

Smokin’ Sartan is STILL trying to hook his boys up with no luck! Poor Speedster Nova is going to die a spinster! And Randy Rix is going to become a cat figurine collector! Slutty Pirate Teagan still seems far more interested in Smokin’  Sartan than either of his friends and while Smokin’ Sartan tried Maria, she didn’t seem all that enthused either. We know that Crew fans are going to accuse us of bringing up old, unfounded rumors and we’re sure that their respective representatives will issue official denials by morning but Maria and Hot Toddy Tical have been seen together a lot lately.  Take it for what you will!

FLAWLESS Koy really needs to get a handle on it! What is wrong with that girl??? She was seen trying to fight in a fair amount of pain Monday night and then when she pulled off those padded boots she’s been fighting in, she had cuts all over her feet! And they were bleeding everywhere! Why in the world was this girl in a ring??? Her husband, The Gov MAN-tastic Matt, is going to be livid when he hears about this!!! We hear that Doc Eva went to work and lectured the Un-FLAWLESS looking Koy about fighting in her condition. Ridiculous!

Edited: December 8th, 2009

Fall Warlord Tournament!

A talented pool of warlords that included several former barons and former overlords gathered to fight it out in the Fall cycle Warlord Tournament for an intercession free shot at the unpopular Overlord, Anubis Karos. There were twelve warlords plus the Talon (due to a new perk that will now be associated with the Talon allowing its winner to enter into the storied event) and it seemed that all were well prepared to lay it all down for a chance to win the test of endurance, stamina, and heart!

That corny enough for you? Great! Onto the show!

We love Slutty Pirate Teagan because she never fails to entertain! It seems  she is not giving up on her desire to bed Smokin’ Sartan. Not that we can blame her. The guy seems to spend all of his time working out. However, that girl really cannot seem to get enough lovin’ to make her happy. She’s got to have some daddy issues… or self-esteem issues… or maybe a combination of them both. Later in the evening, Smokin’ Sartan was seen trying to hook S.P. Teagan up with his single buddies, Speedster Nova and Randy Rix. Either he’s a really bad wingman or she’s smarter than we think she is because she turned the boys down. Better luck next time, guys!

Oddly enough, Morgan showed up to duel! We hear that she had a less than stellar night but we can only hope that’ll bring her into the Arena more to hone her skills! There were quite a few old-timers not only dueling but also watching! In fact, Des was in the house! Yep, you read that right! SUUUUUPER DES! We’re so glad to see her back! You better believe we’re dying to know where she’s been, though! She was pretty tight-lipped about what she’s been up to as of late. She’s definitely a very private sort of lady but if we find out anything we’ll be sure to pass it along!

What is up with FLAWLESS Koy??? We really hate to say this because we absolutely adore the woman but…. is it just us or is she not looking quite so FLAWLESS these days??? We’re not just talking about those awful boots she’s been wearing (which she evidently has to wear because of an injury) but she down right just seems like a mess and there were no signs of change at the tournament while she hung out with Baroness Real Estate Mogul Rena and one of the warlords entered in the tournament, Kheldar. Our sources say that they rarely see her without Red Orc Brewery’s Skullsplitter Ale in hand. We sure hope she gets her act together soon. We don’t like to see this at all!

R.E.M. Rena had her new man, Rico, at her side while she watched the warlords battle it out. We hear that Cowboy Jake showed up for a while and invited the pair of them to a tree trimming party on his ranch. What fun! He also made sure to extend a very special invitation to the gal he’s seemed to have his eye on, Marvelous Mira, but Marvelous Mira didn’t really commit and suggested she may get stuck working. He’s hot, honey! And he’s polite and hot and good to you and hot! You HAVE to make that happen!

Sullen Sal and Deliciously Sinful Sin had another date night in the Arena. The pair spent the night snuggled together and seemed to have a bet riding on the winner of the tournament. We can’t tell you what the bet was because it’s too graphic for even THIS publication but nevertheless we bet the boys had fun after the tournament. Both chose Wrecking Crew members with Sullen Sal put his hopes on Tical and D.S. Sin putting his on Kheld. Interestingly enough, the Crew guys had LOYAL Baroness (and fellow Crew member) Maria on hand to support his bid to win a chance to take down the Overlord.

In the end it was Sullen Sal who turned up the winner of the night when his pick ended up winning! Tical came out of the winner’s bracket after dominating the competition and defeated Joex who banged his way through the one-loss bracket. Therefore, it’ll be yet ANOTHER rematch between the Warlord Tical and Overlord Anubis!

Congratulations, Tical!

Edited: December 8th, 2009

Another New Relationship Bites the Dust Monday!

White Knight Julian certainly seems taken by the lovely Rhian that he’s been seen spending so much time with in recent months. The pair were spotted together Monday night chatting amicably in the Red Dragon Inn. The pair were overheard by our sources planning a picnic dinner with a little poetry reading. How sweet! This relationship certainly seems to be on a fast track towards marriage! Rhian certainly has something W.K. Julian wants!

Maybe Grumbling Grem’s getting old! He seems a little off his game! Evidently someone… or something.. got the best of him because he was looking awfully beat up Monday night. We hear that Our Darling Taneth tried to console him but the Grumbler was being his usual sour puss self. And O.D. Taneth wasn’t the only one! Our sweet, lovely Cutie Carley (Oh, how we’ve missed her!) was in the Inn according to our sources and did her best as well. Only the Grumbler could resist the charms of O.D. Taneth AND Cutie Carley! We hear that his mood did improve some when Mad Kazzy entered the building. We STILL have no clue what the attraction between the pair is! They must have some really good sex or something.

So much for Darcy’s new guy! She didn’t seem like a taken woman at all as she was playing drinking games with Brale Brother Reap! No man wants their new girlfriend hanging out with a brale brother! At least we hear that there was no brale made this particular night. B.B. Reap was overheard saying that Darcy owes him “nakedness”. Woooonderful! And interestingly enough while Darcy was in the Inn flirting it up with B.B. Reap, her new man, Drake, was in the Outback talking about how much he’d like to see topless dueling. Wow. Definitely a short-lived relationship!

It seems that SUUUUPER Des might very well be a regular in the Outback on Monday nights again! That makes us sooooo happy! She was seen egging the crowd into duels in between her calls. She’s still been quite tight-lipped about what she’s been up to since she’s away and how her family is doing. We’re quite curious as to what’s going on in her life. Don’t worry, our loyal readers, if we don’t find out what’s going on soon, yours truly may very well have to make a personal visit to the Outback on a Monday night to get it out of her!

O.D. Taneth seemed to be having an awfully bad night! Her charms did not have work on the Grumbler and Sullen Sal, who usually can NEVER resist her, was not nice either!!! We hear that he pried a knife away from her so she didn’t poke her eye out as she was bouncing around and then stormed out when she tried to cuddle up with him. He actually hurt her feelings! NOT COOL!!! Sullen Sal should totally make it up to her. Neo certainly didn’t resist when O.D. Taneth cuddled up to him and we have to love him for it. Who doesn’t like a good hug from O.D. Taneth???

WHAT?!?! We hear that Duci mentioned the fact that Simmering Sivanna is moving in with some guy!!! We had no idea! The conversation certainly brought a blush to S. Sivanna’s beautiful cheeks. We have to find out more! Maybe a trip to the Outback really is in order because our sources seem to be missing quite a lot these days. We HAVE to know more! For example, who is this guy that seems to have captured S. Sivanna’s no-nonsense sort of heart???

An exhausted looking Prof. Jolyon only had eyes for his woman, Real Estate Mogul Rena! He made a beeline to her and the pair chatted the night away. It seems that Prof. Jolyon is still awfully worried about the missing Lil’ Lirssa. We’re sure the girl will show up soon. She always does! It seems that R.E.M. Rena is being a real anchor for Prof. Jolyon during these trying times. It seems that this pair is certainly moving along now!

Edited: June 13th, 2009