Root Beer Pirate Tuesday!

Deliciously Sinful Sin evidently lost his best employee. He was overheard relaying the details to The Many Faces of Fio and SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee in the Red Dragon Inn Tuesday night. Evidently the employee gave no notice and just took off. Awesome! We knew D.S. Sin was a cad but we had no idea he was a bad employer! That’s actually quite hard to imagine! T.M.F.O. Fio seemed to blame it on the employee in question saying that he had “personal troubles”.

Poor, dear Amber! It seems that SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee had to tell her that Captain Stephen (who she had chosen to export her root beer) was a pirate! Uhhhh, we’re not really sure how Amber missed that memo but she was practically in disbelief when SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee told her! We sure hope he doesn’t rip her off because she seems to be fully expecting to become rich very soon off this venture!

Well, well, well…. big surprise! Crazy Train Tara was seen on Twilight Island trying to convince Keeper Neo to turn his talents on hurting her husband instead of her uncle — Overlord Old Man Tass! Neo seemed to think she was joking. We’re pretty sure that she probably wasn’t. If only C.T. Tara’s husband knew her scheming and backstabbing ways! We wonder what he would do to her!

Edited: August 30th, 2009

Baby Bump Monday!

Awesome Alain deemed the Red Dragon Inn worthy of his presence Monday night and was seen hanging out with the usual crowd of pretty girls who are entirely wrong for him. Michiko was there at his side. As loyal and reliable as a old retriever, she is! We hear the new one was drinking a mixture of blood and soda (wonderful) and goes by the name Lilith. She was even heard discussing using Alain’s product to sponsor jello wrestling. Le sigh! Seriously, Awesome Alain, it’s time that you start dating within your position in life. These girls are no baron’s wife. Have your people call the interns. We must do lunch again very soon. We must discuss these poor choices, dear friend!

Another night, another new man for SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee. We hear that she was seen discussing a night of dancing with a man over drinks. We also hear that she was overheard saying that she does indeed like presents. Maybe that’s what she’s after! We never have quite figured out why she hops from man to man. Maybe she’s just trying to gain a gigantic haul of presents. We’ve spent two and a half years speculating and we feel no closer to the answer. We are plenty sure that there is not a man in RhyDin that can catch her attention for more than a week, though.

It seems that Love Bird Aja has moved on to a new love of her life. Even we have a difficult time keeping up and it’s our full-time job! L.B. Aja was spotted in the Outback talking at length about the wonders of True who, yes, did indeed break up with Marvelous Mira. What??? Who dumps Marvelous Mira??? Well, True’s loss is the rest of RhyDin’s gain! Come and get her, guys! She’s one heck of a sweetie, not to mention a TOTAL hottie!

The lovely not-so new girl AJ is starting to look downright PLUMP! That’s just how we like our pregnant ladies! She was seen hanging out in the Outback, drinking orange juice and chatting about her new not-so flattering wardrobe. Why are you ladies so afraid of your pregnant bellies??? They’re BEAUTIFUL! Men, especially husbands, LOVE pregnant women. She’s still with that doctor and, in fact, we’re hearing rumors that the pair even got married while we were away. Good for them! Too many babies are born in this city out of wedlock. Now STICK WITH IT! Marriage isn’t easy!

Edited: August 4th, 2009

Launch of the GangSTAR Children’s Foundation / Fio and Ali’s Wedding!

We here at the Den of Gossip have been discussing how we may be able to give more back to the community that we love for well over a year. The GangSTAR Children’s Foundation came out of just these talks and we were thrilled to be able to launch it with a fantastic cocktail party in the Red Dragon Inn Friday night! It was, of course, all PINKED out! We named some great pink cocktails after Ehz’s nicknames for us — the Pinkoodle Fluff consisting of iced pink lemonade with a light rum in a hurricane glass and the Farfenpooter combining vodka, triple sec, cranberry juice black currant juice, and a dash of sour mix into a chilled martini glass. There were also waiters in well-tailored black suits complimented with pink ties making the rounds around the Inn with trays of hors d’oeuvres and a full spread of more filling foods laid out on the bar.

We were so thrilled to see some of our favorite people in attendance and, of course, we followed up with as many as we could to see how things in their lives were going.

Our Darling Taneth was looking ever the young beauty that she is! She gave me the great pleasure of FINALLY being able to meet Sullen Sal. We definitely can see what Deliciously Sinful Sin sees in him. Never one to change for anyone he was in jeans and a t-shirt and while we may not HEART his fashion sense we do HEART the way he is always himself. Definitely a HAWT guy and anyone who is sweet and caring to Our Darling Taneth gets biiiiig kudos in our book! She’s the best!

Lucky Lawyer Lucien was present and accounted for as well. Despite rumors that he has been seen looking quite melancholy and somber over the past month (come on, it’s L.L. Lucien after all, being somber is what makes him HAWT), he seemed to be in an excellent mood. He told yours truly that he brought out his best smile for the event. That smile, unfortunately, did not last the entire evening which we’ll explain later!

Ballerina Katarina looked to die for in a strapless yellow sundress! Certainly practically anything on that body would look expensive but we did question her about her fabulous fashion sense that we believe comes from her boyfriend, Lil’ Boy Blue Locke. When we questioned her on it she was a wee bit illusive but did admit that L.B.B. Locke occasionally supplies her with a dress or two. Who wouldn’t take his help??? He’s one snazzy dresser! She also confirmed that they have not yet gotten engaged. Although, we are hearing that they are shacking up together.

SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee never fails to bring attention to herself! She was wearing an uber sexy black strapless gown with white and gray vines printed into the fabric. It had quite the slit as well to show off more than a little of those famous/infamous legs. She greeted yours truly by jumping from the bar into my arms. She’s awfully lucky I have good reflexes or she may have gotten hurt! Knowing SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee she would have merely landed on a bed of magical roses instead.

I also got to catch up with one of our most avid readers in Cutie Carley! She was certainly enjoying the great food and the company. We hear that she definitely made the rounds and was even seen chatting with a number of people that we didn’t know she was familiar with. That young lady can make a friend out of ANYONE!!! We do have to wonder where she has been the past several months. All she told us is that it is “fun out of RhyDin”. Iiiinteresting!

Prof. Jolyon was busy giving his nightly lecture to Lil’ Lirssa when we found our way over to them. Lil’ Lirssa was again looking mighty spiffy in an adorable hunter green skirt and matching jacket. Such a little lady! Unfortunately, I only had a brief opportunity to discuss our shared interest — the plight of poverty-stricken children in this city.

But we’re quite sure that you would rather here of our discussion with her handsome tutor than our charity work anyway, you gossip scoundrels! Well, we did in fact discuss the nature of Prof. Jolyon’s relationship with Real Estate Mogul Rena (who joined us at the hearth as well). Unfortunately, he continued to remain koy about what exactly is going on there. From our very brief discussion with R.E.M. Rena in which she called him a “puzzle” it seems we are not the only ones confused by his behavior! The two did chat for quite a while afterward! Maybe a discussion on the state of their relationship???

We hear that Renna was in an amazingly sexy black number and was seen catching up with Icer. Unfortunately, Renna had moved on by the time I made it over to Icer’s couch where she was chatting with Drake…. who is yet another one of her relatives, according to our sources. Evidently the first of the current batch of Icer’s brood has begun hatching. It’s no wonder she’s trying to stay out of the house…. or den or cave or whatever!

Our sources caught more details on the upcoming wedding of Overlord Tormay and Our Darling Taneth! O.D. Taneth was overheard telling Sex Pot Kitty and Old Man Tass that the pair had decided to ask Therapist Chryrie to marry them! How cuuuute! Knowing T. Chryrie she will insist on pre-marriage counseling. Wouldn’t you love to just be a fly on the wall for one of those meetings? How much fun would pre-marriage counseling with O. Tormay and O.D. Taneth be???

Doc Anya was there on the arm of her man, Alper. She had the nerve of welcoming us to the cause of helping children in this city… which we find completely insulting to all the time, talent, and money that we here at the Den of Gossip have sunk into our favorite charities over the past two years we have worked in this city… and, really, that’s all we have to say about either of them. Thankfully, our night was brightened by some of the yummy eye candy that was occupying the table! Simmering Sivanna truly is TO DIE FOR! The woman just oooooozes sex! She was in a fantastic strapless black number that was cinched around the middle to show off her teeny tiny waist. Love her! The dashing Neo was also present. We hear some fantastic things about his exploits within the rings of the dueling venues. We may have to make a special trip there to see him for ourselves!

That lovely new girl AJ was around and chatting with Doc Eva and Ballerina Katarina. We’re hearing rumors that the girl might actually be pregnant. Wowzers! She and that man of her’s juuuuust hooked up and started living together as well. Now that’s a lot of pressure on a brand new relationship. We don’t understand why these kids can’t just slow things down. Why are they in such a damn hurry??? Well, perhaps speaking with Doc Eva gave her some perspective. Doc Eva isn’t exactly on the rocket express with her own relationship. They seem to be taking it nice and slow… which is probably a good thing since there’s still a TON of tension between her and her ex.

And then it was time for the big EVENT! We were so honored and delighted when The Many Faces of Fio and Awful Ali asked yours truly to unite them in holy matrimony! T.M.F.O. Fio looked delicious in a short, sassy indigo silk dress with a drop waist and ruffled skirt. And while we all knew A. Ali is suuuuper HAWT, he looked especially elegant in his black silk jodphuri jacket. Their witnesses seemed to be RhyDin’s Redheaded Stepchild, Tara, and a goat. We were straight and to the point and before the crowd knew it, T.M.F.O. Fio and A. Ali were JOINED!!! And they looked radiantly happy (and a bit nervous as to how everyone would react) about it!

Who doesn’t love a good surprise wedding???

Well, it seems that it didn’t take long for us to find out! Deliciously Sinful Sin and Old Man Tass stood in shock giving us the evil eye. And we must admit that it pained us to see it from D.S. Sin! Sex Pot Kitty and Lucky Lawyer Lucien stormed out of the Inn even! Shock reigned supreme for quite a while before people began congratulating the newly married couple.

We hear that the celebrating went on laaaate into the night and we must admit that these two are incredibly cute together. Only time will tell if they can stick it out in the harsh limelight of RhyDin but we certainly are hoping for the best for them. We certainly wouldn’t want the first marriage we officiated to end in divorce!

TO THE BRIDE AND GROOM!

Edited: June 27th, 2009

Tag Wednesday!

Crazy Risa always seems to have a good idea or two up her sleeve and her shift behind the bar Wednesday night in the Red Dragon Inn was no exception! Every patron was given a white t-shirt and provided with all sorts of markers and paint pens with the goal of writing on one another’s t-shirts. Are we the only one with the visual of Deliciously Sinful Sin walking around the room with marker in hand to sign every breast in the place? No? We didn’t think so.

Unfortunately, D.S. Sin wasn’t present but quite a few of the Inn’s other regulars were!

The Many Faces of Fio drew quite the masterpiece on Awful Ali’s and he jotted down something on her’s in some language that our sources present couldn’t read. The pair were quite into each other once again! They get cuter by the day to us. It’s hard to hate Awful Ali when he is so good to T.M.F.O. Fio! Plus, we’re sure that with all her bad ass friends constantly shooting him the evil eye he knows better than to hurt her!

The merry-makers just couldn’t get SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee into a t-shirt but she was seen doodling on several people by some sort of magical means. She always seems to have a handful of male admirers that want her attention. Wednesday night was no exception.

Lizard King Bran was seen in a t-shirt proclaiming him the “triple crown winner” in recognition of having claimed all three of the top titles in the dueling world. In an interesting mix of personalities, he was seen chatting with Cutie Carley who seemed to be having a blast! Cutie Carley really loved the markers, especially Crazy Risa’s scented ones! We’re going to have to make sure we send her a box along with the back issues of the GangSTAR that she’s missed!

It seems that Lil’ Lirssa’s friends are thrilled to have her back. Still no word as to her disappearance. Head of the Fam Johnny seemed to be keeping a careful eye on her as was Lil’ Boy Blue Locke.  Lil’ Lirssa was overheard telling L.B.B. Locke that she no longer speaks to any of the Smiths! It’s certainly hard to tell when L. Lirssa is telling the truth and when she’s yanking someone’s chain but our sources SWEAR that she’s serious. L.B.B. Locke asked why but all L. Lirssa would say was that it was for her own reasons.

Later she was overheard talking to Doc Anya about Merchant Antonio. It seems that Lil’ Lirssa, like may of us, is quite disappointed in his life decisions. Much of the city is talking about this issue so we will merely add our opinion this once before being done with the issue. Life is tough. The world which we live in is hard and everyone needs a partner to get through it. Marriage is between two people — be it a man and a woman or a woman and a woman or a man and a man or a fox and an goblin or a elf and one of those green people that Awesome Alain has working for him. A marriage between two people commits them to a life of protecting one another, being there for one another, and putting their family (even if family means just the two of them) before anything or anyone else. Marrying two people is disrespectful to the institution. If you want to have two men to sleep with and enjoy the company of, fine. Grown adults may do whatever grown adults want. However, you cannot commit yourself to a life of being there for two different people. It flies in the face of everything that marriage stands for.

Do not give up hope, Lil’ Lirssa. There are many fine examples of marriage in this city. Perhaps this publication should work a little bit harder to promote those relationships rather than the train wrecks that while more entertaining are disheartening to many.

Edited: June 21st, 2009

Adventurous Ho Friday!

THIS is why we absolutely adore Therapist Chryrie! We hear that she was seen giving Lots of Babies’ Mama Icer a very stern lecture about planned parenthood. FOR REAL! Unfortunately, it seems as if it’s a little too late. She’s already pregnant and will be laying a new batch of fire breathers in a next couple of days. Peeeerfect. The speech didn’t seem to be having any impact either. Really, something MUST be done!

Speaking of Therapist Chryrie, her sister Sex Pot Kitty later told somebody that Therapist Chryrie is now dating Psycho Skid! OMG! She actually used the word “boyfriend”. What an odd, odd, odd turn of events! These two have often been touchy feely though. Perhaps it was only a matter of time. Psycho Skid certainly has become a real man in the last couple of months! Maybe it’ll actually work out for him this time.

It seems that SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee was seen dancing up a storm with her old flame, Julien. It seems that after the loss of her white knight to another woman, SPLENDIFEROUS Kairee had an open seat for a second man-friend! Intern Hot to Trot called her an “adventurous ho”. Harsh but a bit accurate, yes.

Redhead Tara told Our Darling Taneth that she would pay for whatever honeymoon that O.D. Taneth and Overlord Tormay choose. What a fantastically lucky girl! We hear that O.D. Taneth mentioned that she’d like to go on a cruise. We’re quite curious to see how that honeymoon goes. While we’d be hard pressed to find a lovelier bride, we’re also hard pressed (at least in this city) to find a more naive bride. Should be a beautiful wedding, though! Those kids are adorable together!

Edited: June 17th, 2009